Thursday, March 26, 2015

Bummed

S.O.L. #   out of 31

As we were getting ready for bed, my little guy (2nd grader) mentioned his bum hurting.  When I asked him why it was hurting, he identified the cause was when he stood up in class today and another boy removed his chair so when he sat back down he actually fell on the floor (and hurt his tailbone).  What really broke my heart was he naively commented,
“Yea, and other kids were laughing but I really don’t know why.”

What does a mama say? :'(

No he didn’t say anything to the boy and
no he didn’t report it to the teacher.

Did I think the other boy needed to learn a lesson?
---yes ma’am!
Do I think the “other kids” needed a talkin’ to?
--yes, of course.

But the only person I could teach a lesson to at that moment was my boy.
I just said that some kids just don’t make very good choices sometimes. 
Hard telling why that boy did what he did.
And some “other kids” just don’t know how to respond appropriately in situations.

We processed through his emotions about how he felt at the moment (without dwelling on them) but to help him identify them and use those emotions to drive his response to future situations..I told him it is completely appropriate you use your strong voice to say, “Hey that makes me mad!” or in a serious manner to reply “That’s not cool man.”
or even express “That really hurt and it makes me sad you did that.”

Will he utilize any of these responses in the future?
----I don’t know.
But I wanted him to feel empowered to respond to any other situations that  make him feel sad/mad/embarrassed.

If nothing else, I hope he felt his mamma’s love, even at school the next day (because I sent a cushion for his hard chair and his sore bum)

5 comments:

  1. So important that you gave him tools to handle the situation in the future. This is a wonderful gift to give him, even if you want to solve the problem for him in a more overt way. You taught him to fish, instead of giving him some fish to eat for one meal.

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  2. I'm just so curious how the teacher had no idea any of this happened. That makes me want to use my mad voice. I'm so glad you tried to give your little guy the words to empower himself against others who make bad choices! I'm sure he felt your love and at the end of the day that is what's important.

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  3. That's so sad. I hope he remembers your words in the future so they become his words. Good teaching moment.

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  4. awwww sorry little buddy! You are such a great mom for taking the time to slow down enough to listen and catch these small moments then you can lovely mend those small tears in his heart that happen no matter how hard we try to keep them safe.

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  5. Great post. thanks for the shared with us. dyed yarn

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